Today I Really want to discuss something rarely talked about… Familial allegiance to the abuser. I watch the same scenario play out again and again… the family is in complete denial of the victim’s experience. Now what we need to digest here is that in that denial, they hold support for the abuser. So often the abuser is still held within that family. I’ve watched families where, it is very clear… That’s my brother, I’m going to stand beside him or that’s my dad. Uncle Clarence? He didn’t do anything to me… But the best is… Well, what did you do to cause it, right? What clothes were you wearing? How could we possibly let this happen it will ruin him? It’s completely upside down. And often these are children. It’s no wonder these memories are hidden away in these loops for another day. When you know that you’re speaking your truth is going to create divide, and you’re going to be the one divided out… As if you’re the cancer and you’ve done nothing wrong. This is a really big deal. Familial allegiance to the abuser is a mountain the survivor has to climb. A hurdle that the outside world has to start recognizing. The consequences of telling a child to keep a secret…. or when they are accused of wrong doing… or their perception is doubted… All of this creates a fester that lasts a lifetime! So collectively we have to start standing our power. Call in clarity and bravery and put allegiance beside the right person. Doing the thinking required to bring clarity in around what you want or what Self-respect would look like is a must. When we start taking back and recognizing that we’re taking back our choices, we’re taking back our power. This is your game and only you can play it. 🤹‍♀

Posted by Cherie at 2022-03-29 02:57:42 UTC